I have millions of words to choose
by Nicconicco
Summary: Hermione got hit by an unknown, but deadly, curse and now, a week later, she only has hours left to live.


**Disclamiar: If I were J.K Rowling I wouldn't write fan fics on my own books. duuh**

**A/N: okay, another LONG one-shot from meeee. I actually say before I started this fic not to write more than three pages. but it turned out to be lite... 8... hehe..****Draco May be a little OCC, but I think you'll understand why..****Anyway, enjoy, and I'm sorry for my grammar mistakes and spelling, as always, but feel free to tell me! and there may be other mistakes. I had to delete this fic four times yesterday, because I founf mistakes, for examlpe; ALL Mr. and Mrs. was gone! isn't that wierd? :O  
Okay, this is getting on my nerves! this is the FIFTH Time I upload this! I've changed Mr. till sir och Mrs. till your wife. It didn't work out! I'm pretty pissed. And this time I had to delete it because it "didn't Exist" even if I just Uploaded it! seriously... anyway. let's hope it will work this time..****  
cheer me up with some reviews will you? thanks **

**once again: enjoy!  
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**I have millions of words to choose.

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A dark silhouette moved across the road behind the two wizards. He hid behind a trash can, watching them, as they walked hand in hand along the way. His eyes could have started to glow the darkest green of envy, he growled and his eyes turned into thin slits.

As he moved again to get closer to the pair, he accidently hit a can and it loudly rolled down the road towards the couple. The shadow just managed to get him out of sigh, as the wizards stopped and spinned around on the spot.

"What was that?" he heard the shorter one whisper in the other's ear. Obviously this was the girl and she sounded frightened.

"Probably a cat," the long guy whispered back and rubbed her back. "Come on, let's go home."

They started to walk again, a little faster, down the dark road. Their follower got out from his hiding place and walked, more careful, after them again. He had to work fast or he'll loose them again.

You see, he'd followed this couple around for weeks, trying to figure out where and when he would strike. He was so jealous on the guy he would do anything to get him from the beautiful girl he had wrapped around his finger.

A car drove past them and the light gave the shadow a face, and because of the sudden hit of light, he looked like a deer, frozen with his blue eyes big like… well, something big and round. He was long, he wore black and he had freckles and red hair.

The car had been long gong when the red-head came to his senses. He shook his head and watched around for the couple. He began to panic when he didn't see them, but then he heard that beautiful laugh and he saw two dark figures walk around the corner at the end of the road.

The moment they disappeared he ran to catch up. There they were, kissing, right under the light of the lamppost.

_Now is the time of action, _he thought angrily, and drew his wand.

He muttered something under his breath, too quietly to be heard but still very harsh. And a light of pure silver shoot from his wand and hit the girl straight in the back. She staggered and fell to the ground, her boyfriend stood there for a few seconds as if he hadn't realized what just happened, then it hit him and he fell to his knees beside his girl and tried to make contact. He didn't get any, so he took her in her arms and hugged her close.

The red-headed figure smiled an almost inhuman smile when he saw the scene in front of him, and before he disappeared into the night, he could have sworn he saw and heard the boy cry.

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Draco kneeled down beside his beautiful brunette. Her eyes were closed; she looked like she was in a peaceful sleep.

_What just happened?_ He wondered in panic.

He tried to wake her up, he wanted her to be asleep, but deep down he knew she wasn't. But she couldn't be dead, it wasn't that light.

He couldn't think straight, and he wrapped his arms around her and held her close, and he cried. He was so afraid she had died; he just let his tears fall.

Then suddenly… she stirred. And let out a painful moan.

* * *

"I am sorry sir, but we don't know what curse that hit your wife, and therefore we can not treat her. I'm sorry to say that the end is near for your wife. I would suggest you, your daughter and son will say goodbye as soon as possible. Before it's too late," the healer placed a hand on Dracos arm. "I truly am sorry, we've done everything we could to make her stay, but it's her time to go," she said softly and left.

Draco couldn't believe it, he was going to loose her. She would leave him all alone with the twins. _It's not fair._

He sat down on the chair and put his head in his hands, and once again, the tears fell.

"Daddy," a soft little voice whispered in his ear. Draco looked up and met a pair of big hazel brown eyes.

"Hi Tiny," he said and gave his daughter a brave smile.

"Where's mummy?" she said and looked around.

A pang of hurt hit Draco in his chest, and his smile faded.

"Damien, come back here! You can't run around in here!" as Draco looked down the corridor to look where the voice came from, he saw a tiny boy on four run towards him with a frustrated nanny behind him. Damien ran to Draco and hugged him. Draco picked him up and placed him on his lap.

"I am so sorry sir, I told them you wanted to be alone, but they wouldn't stop screaming, I didn't know what to do!" the nanny panted and put her glasses right.

"It's okay," was the simple answer she got, and he didn't even look up. After a few minutes he said, with a low and painful voice:

"Actually, it's good they're here, we have to do be somewhere,"

He looked at the little girl beside him and put an arm around her. "Damien and Destiny are you ready to see your mum? She's been waiting for you."

Both kids light up and jumped of the bench opposite of a white door with a tiny glass window.

"You have to be quite though, mummy may be asleep," he said quietly and the children instantly stopped. Draco held out his hands for the twins to take and walked into the dark room.

There, at the other side of the room, was a bed with white sheets. One single lamp hung over it and gave a soft light. A little form lay there, breathing slowly.

The little trio approached it and sat down at the single chair by the bed, the two little kids in their fathers lap.

What Draco saw made his eyes water. His beautiful angel lay there, her usually tanned face, was almost white and ghost like. She had dark bags under her closed eyes and her lips weren't the same pink color it had been just weeks ago. She didn't deserve this, no one did. He knew she was in pain, but even though he didn't want her to suffer anymore, he could not let her go. Was that making him selfish? Was it really that selfish to want her to stay?

_Yes, it is. It _is_ selfish to make her stay, and make her live in pain. _

In that moment Draco was torn. What will he do without her? How was he supposed to manage to raise two kids on his own? He barely knew what to do before she got hit with that curse.

He looked at his two demons, and sighed. He had to try; they were soon the only thing left, the only thing to keep him steady on the ground. He had to, for her.

"Mummy? Wake up, the sun isn't sleeping yet," he heard Destiny say, and he looked at her worried face.

"Yeah, why is mummy sleeping daddy?" his miniature self asked him. He had to tell them, he didn't have any other choice.

"You see, mummy is really sick, so she needs to rest," he begun. This was going to be hard, how do you tell two four years olds, mummy's not going to be okay?

"Oh… But when'll she come home then?" Destiny asked.

Draco took a deep breath and looked at his beloved wife.

"She won't," he said simply, and let one single tear begin its journey down his cheek. He looked at his children and saw their puzzled looks, and their attempt to understand.

He sighed and continued. "Mum will live up in the sky, with all the other angels. No one of the other angels will be as beautiful though," he smiled a little. "She will be watching over us, and make sure we're okay. She will make sure no monster is hiding under your bed or in your closet. She will look over you when you leave for school and over me when I'll be alone. No matter where she goes, she will always be in our hearts and we will love her forever, just as she will love us."

Damien was crying silently, Destiny's eyes were full of tears. Draco knew they understood; they both got their mothers cleverness after all.

"W-will m-m-mummy die d-daddy?" Destiny sobbed and finally her tears fell. Draco hugged the little ones close and he, too, let his tears fall.

"Yes honey, that's why it's so important for you to tell her how much you love her," he whispered and felt the movement on his chest; his children nodded their heads.

Draco put Destiny and Damien on the floor and sat on his knees beside the bed. He moved one single strand of hair from her eyes and behind her ear. He touched her cheek, and he got shocked over how cold it was, and whispered softly:

"Hermione, honey, it's time to wake up. Our two demons are here."

She stirred a little, let out a soft moan and slowly and carefully opened her eyes.

Her eyes, her beautiful eyes had lost all of the warmth and life they once held. Draco looked at Destiny and saw the very same eyes he had learned to love so much six years earlier. How he longed to live those years one more time. These six years had been the most wonderful years in his life. Never had he felt so loved.

"D-Draco?" he came back to reality at the weak voice that called him.

"Yes, yes it's me. And look who I brought with me," he said. He had grabbed her hand in his right, and he pushed the twins forward with his left. "They… they've come to… to…" his voice drifted away. He squeezed her hand for support and took a deep breath. "To say goodbye." He pressed her hand to his face and kissed it. Hermione looked at him with big eyes, as if he'd grown an extra head.

In that moment a healer came through the door and walked up to the other side of Hermione's bed.

"Oh, you're awake, good," the healer looked at Hermione for a while with a sad expression, she took a breath and continued: "I am really sorry to say this; but we've done everything we can to find a cure for this unknown curse. But we can't do anything more, I am very sorry, but unfortunately you don't have much time left, as I said to before, I would suggest you to say farewell to your family. I am very sorry, we really tried everything we could," she laid a hand on Hermione's shoulder and left.

"I-I… Wha-Oh Draco!" Hermione couldn't believe her ears, was she going to die? Was she about to leave her family on their own? How would Draco raise their kids all by himself? He doesn't know anything of taking care of a child, sure he had been wonderful and very caring when she said she was pregnant, but still. He'd done everything he could to be a good dad, she new it, but what troubles her is that Draco didn't have a very good childhood. He had said from the very start he was afraid to be like his father had been. He didn't even dare to hold the newborn twins for weeks because he thought he would loose it. When Hermione had convinced him that nothing would happen, and he finally dared to hold them, he barely let them go.

She was afraid that he would change towards them when she was gone, what if he took her death to hard and he let it out on the kids? She new he wouldn't be able to live with himself the moment he understood what he'd done.

"Draco," she said in a week whisper and she got his fullest attention. "I need to talk to you alone."

Draco looked at her with a worried expression. Then he turned to Damien and Destiny.

"I need to talk to mum for a while, would you like to go to the children area or wait in the corridor?" he said softly.

"The… the corridor, please" Destiny said, Draco understood, they weren't in a mood of playing at the moment. Draco took their hands and walked out. Damien and Destiny sat on the bench outside and Draco lowered himself to the same level.

"Be nice now, and stay here, I will get you when it's time to say goodbye," they nodded and he kissed their foreheads and walked back to Hermione.

He moved the chair a bit closer and sat down, with her small cold hands, in his own big and warm.

They sat in silence for a while, just to look at each other, before Hermione spoke slowly in her usually week and quiet voice.

"Draco, I know how badly my death will be for you three, especially for you, but I need you to promise me not to break down and let your anger and frustration out on our kids. I know how bad your temper can be, and I don't want you to do anything you will regret. No one knows you as good as I, and I know your biggest fear is to be like your father," Draco shuddered and looked at the floor for a moment. He felt her hand squeeze his and he looked at her again. "But I believe in you Draco, I know you better than that, you are NOT your father, don't you dare forget that." He nodded."My death will affect you very hard, I know that, but you have to be strong for our children, it will be as hard for them as it is for you. I want you to be there for them, and make sure nothing happens to them… can you promise me that?"

Draco looked into her beautiful eyes and he felt protected. He didn't know why, but every time he stared into her eyes, he felt it. And even if she was gone, he would still her eyes on him, whatever he did. They would look up on him, and be amazed and proud. They would never leave him, they will always be in his heart… and they will be borne with pride by one of the most beautiful girls he had ever seen in his entire life; Destiny. His little girl, his miniature Hermione, his heart.

Destiny looked just like Hermione did when she was younger, but because of Draco, she didn't have that wild brushy hair, but waves and curls, it was still chocolate brown and long though. She had the same intelligence as her mother, and she loved to read. Hermione said she was very much alike Draco, and she was assured she would end up in Slytherin: she was very quick in her mouth and even though she's just four years old, she has her jokes and little pranks. A clever girl, she is very good to make her brother do things, and he is the one that gets the pranks. People are amazed at what she could come up with, and Hermione always says: "she gets it from her father."Draco doesn't agree though, sure, he 'know' she has gotten her cleverness from him, but he always says it's from Hermione she gets the rule breaking thing… "Just look at what 'the golden trio' did back at school", he says, and Hermione always gave him the glare that makes him smirk.

Destiny's five minutes younger brother, Damien, though, is a copy of a younger Draco. Same ice blue eyes with storm gray in them, the same smirk and expressions, and the same pointed face and platinum hair. But his hair is a little bit curled, thanks to Hermione. Even Damien is smart, not as smart as his sister though, but smarter than most of the other four year olds. To Draco misery, everyone is assured Damien will be a Gryffindor; he is very brave, loyal. But to Draco pleasure Damien is very good with broomsticks, even though the toy brooms doesn't fly very high, he still zooms out of sight the moment he gets on. He isn't afraid of speed or to fall off. And Draco is very proud, of both his children of course.

"I promise," he answered her after a while of thought.

Hermione smiled a week smile and lay back on her pillow and closed her eyes. Draco let go of her hand and walked out to get his kids. They were at the same place he'd left them, both very quiet.

At the sound of the door, the twins looked up to see their dad with a soft expression.

"I think it's time," he whispered and took their hands.

As the got to the bed Hermione had started to breathe much slower, and much more strained. Draco new the end was near, it made his heart ache.

"Mummy?" said Damien and touched her hand.

"Yes dear," the said and coughed. "My dear angels, how I will miss you, come here."

She held out her arms to allow them to climb onto the bed and into her embrace. She hugged them closely.

"Be nice to daddy, he'll have a tough time for a few months. Don't be afraid to tell him when he does something wrong, he didn't have the same childhood as you do…" she looked at Draco and gave him a week smile. "I know you'll have a hard time for a while, but I don't want any of you to go sulking all your life."

"B-but, mummy, wh-why do you h-have to g-g-go?" Damien sobbed. Beside him, his sister cried in their mothers arms.

"I don't want to honey, I really don't, but I have to. I- They- no one knows why I'm sick, and no one can cure it, and… and it seems that my body is slowly giving up," she lifted one of her pale, cold hands and gently placed it on her son's cheek. "It will be okay, you'll have dad, right?" a little nod. "Exactly, he will always be there to look after you, he will never let anything happen to either of you," she looked between her kids and then on Draco, he nodded.

"Just remember," she continued. "I will ALWAYS love you, no matter what. I will watch over you every step you take."

"Daddy said that too," Destiny whispered and looked at her father.

"And he is right," Hermione said and gave Draco a smile, which he returned.

Hermione was slowly getting more and more tired and week. Draco saw it and asked Destiny and Damien, very gently, if he could have a word with her alone for a minute. They protested a little, but with a pleading look from their father, they obeyed. When they've walked out of the door, Draco turned to Hermione and took her hands in his.

"It's going to be hard, I don't think I am going to manage to get over it anytime soon," he whispered and looked down at their hands.

"Draco… Draco look at me," he looked up with tears in his eyes. "I know it's going to be hard, but you'll have to try, if not for me, then for you and the kids, you can't go around and be depressed, Tiny and Damien needs you, just as much as you need them, and you know it. Please Draco, try," Draco seemed to be unsure. "For me?" now, one lonely tear rolled down his pale cheek, he wiped it away quickly, he didn't want her too see his week side just now.

"I-I don't know, I don't want to disappoint them," he seemed to be embarrassed as he glanced down at the floor.

"You are only disappointing them if you abandoning them," she said simple and quietly.

She started to cough, hard.

When she finally stopped she started to cry, "I don't want to die," she sobbed as Draco hugged her closely. "I-I want to live, and get old with you Draco, I want to see Tiny and Damien when they're going to school," all Draco could do, was to hug her and nod, because he, too, was crying, but very silent.

The door opened and in came Destiny and Damien. They ran to the bed and throw themselves in the embrace of their mother and father. There they sat, just hugging each other, Damien and Destiny fell asleep after a while, and Hermione only got more tired every few seconds, and soon, she couldn't take it anymore.

"Hermione? Hermione!" at the shout from their father, the children woke up and looked around confused and worried. Hermione looked at her family drowsy and gave them a week smile.

"Hermione, I-I have so much to say to you before you leave," Draco's eyes finally gave up and let the tears fall, and Draco didn't do anything to stop them. Hermione still looked at him and gave him a week smile.

"I have so much to say," he repeated silently. "There are so many words. I have millions of words to choose, I will choose them carefully," Hermione nodded slowly for him to continue. "I- I love you Hermione, you and only you." Hermione's eyes widened, she couldn't believe it, and he finally said it, the words she had longed so much to hear. He finally said it; she knew how hard he has to say those words. He'd said loads of other beautiful words to her, but he has always had hard to say those simple words.

She smiled and whispered: "I… love… you… too…" she looked at Draco, then her beloved children. "All of you," she smiled the most beautiful smile Draco had ever seen, and then she closed her eyes. She lost the grip of Draco's hand, the arm she held around Destiny and Damien fell to her side, and the other one, that hold Dracos hand, fell and hang outside of the bed and the smile drifted away slowly.

Draco sank into the chair and put his head in his hands, and cried like he had never done before. He just cried, he didn't care who saw him, he didn't care anymore.

He felt two pair of arms around him and he looked up to see the only two creatures on this earth, which meant anything at all to him now. Damien and Destiny placed themselves in their fathers lap and they sat there for half an hour and just looked at the figure laying there, the figure that just got taken away from them.

A healer came in but stopped when she saw the scene in front of her, she walked forward and placed a hand on Draco's shoulder.

"I am really sorry for you loss, but I have to ask you to leave this room."

Draco just stared blankly in front of him. Then he put the twins down on the floor and kneeled down beside Hermione, he brought he hands to his lips and kissed them. He stood up and bent down over his wife's lifeless form, whispered: "I love you", and placed a sweet kiss on her cheek.

He turned around and grabbed Destiny's and Damien's hands and walked out of the room, in the door the little family turned around to have a final glance at their angel.

It's been a week, and the Malfoy Manor is still as dark and still as it been since that day she got hit with the curse.

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The three last members of the Malfoy family sat in the library and the father read their favorite books out loud. The Library was _her_ favorite place, and she spent most of her days in here. The other members of the family usually sat in there with her or were playing outside. Of course she didn't sit in there all day, she could bring a book outside or in the room her family sat.

Everything had seemed to be so light and cheerful when she lived, she was like the heart, and the sun.

The father and his two children did their best to make it as light and happy as it were before, but of course that didn't work out. None of them had smiled in a long time, they have just been with each other in their attempt to make it better.

The father had moved into his children's room, and they all shared bed. They're not strong enough yet, especially the father. He can't face their bedroom or the bed where the covers from her side, still unmade, smelled just like her.

The once so happy family was broken, they will never heal entirely, there will always be a part missing, nothing and no one can fill that part, it belongs to one, and one only, and that one is Hermione Malfoy, once known as Hermione Granger.

The end.

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**A/N: so what do you think? PLEASE TELL ME!! I BEG YOU**

**Nicconicco  
xxx**


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